Sunday, July 10, 2016

Tales and tails from the Coast!

There be many strange tales emanating from the Coast. You may not always be there, first hand to hear, to observe, hence my propensity to illuminate your day with a direct report from the 'source' of some rather unusual sights. I even predict some discomfort re some of these episodes---sort of in the vein of a 'warning,' because one does not want to cause any issues on the 'morrow.' AS some of you may know, a growing number of Aucklanders are moving to the Coast---Thames in particular and then make the daily journey back to the big smoke for work. Others, like myself, only return a day a week and even then, try to find an excuse NOT to make the journey. The Coast is a place of magic, of fantasy, so there are other solutions for the more 'unusual amongst us. Take for example, someone very close to me---he has come up with his solution for the journey, quite different and I suspect, not one that most of us would attempt. For a start it involves the use of a tail and given the natural human resistance to wearing a tail---well-------oh come on folks---they have been around for aeons---mermaids and mermen! So---if you are travelling by boat or any other floating craft tomorrow, because you either work in or on the sea, or transverse the shorter distance between Auckland and Thames, then do not be surprised by the sight of a smallish boat been towed by a mythical creature---with a large colourful tail!The craft will be 'empty,' unless I hitch a ride of course, but there will be cleaning gear aboard---for use in the stately homes of Auckland. Thus---a message to share--- there is a very good cleaner in Thames, who is happy to come to Auckland to sort out your mess---do not be concerned---he leaves the tail on the boat and assumes human form---just don't push him into a full bath---he will grow a tail. Plus---it will slow down the cleaning of your house. Enjoy the unusual sight tomorrow and other days and do not hesitate to get in touch with me if you want your home cleaned to a standard that most humans can only dream upon! ( Get in touch. OK---I'm off to polish and make sure the mertail is up to the journey!