Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Spur Winged Plover is the name of the Jack Russell scarer!

Perdy is a lucky Jack Russell who gets lots of walks down at the Onehunga Bay. She delights in cavorting in the mud, the water and amongst the long grass; especially that which has taken over the area beyond the fence line. She loves to jump about as she explores the possibility of other ‘life forms,’ namely rats, mice and God knows what. She shoots off under the fence and no matter what I say, she does not willingly come back until she has had her fill. OK, if I get really annoyed and go back to the car and start the engine, she skulks back to me. I haven’t been too worried by this as I am not often in a hurry. When I am---well the blood pressure probably goes up! It seems that a solution to her escaping and not coming back has arisen in the form of some new inhabitants of the ‘grasslands.’ A few weeks ago I noticed that there were some new birds down at the Bay. They were not like the Pukekos that Perdy loves to chase and be chased by. They were not like the gulls that take wing as soon as Perdy is unleashed. NO---these ones set up a guttural screeching and rose above us, then dive bombed an unsuspecting Perdy. Perfect, I thought—Perdy had finally met her match---and then some. There must be some sort of primeval instinct that takes hold and Perdy hates it. She does not like being attacked from above. Back she came, scuttling under the fence, with her tail well and truly clamped between her legs. ‘Let’s go Dad, ‘she implores while I laugh at her. Thanks, Spur Winged Plovers. You have put my monster in her place! www.authorneilcoleman.com

New Zealand's Prime Minister speaks in Tongues---Parliament amazed by this incredilbe 'gift!'

Prime Minister Key of New Zealand has a remarkable gift. He apparently regularly speaks in ‘Tongues’ in the NZ Parliament. He has shown this capacity, this gift on many occasions, causing a great deal of admiration to be directed at him from the NZ public, namely the ’voting’ public, although of course a great many NZers did not bother to vote in the past election, further exposing NZers to yet many more months of listening to Key as he repeats his aforementioned ‘skill.’ An example is the incredible ‘gift’ could have been observed by anyone present, either in person or electronically, as he admitted yesterday that he did not speak to his ‘friend’, Cameron Slater, the man who gave ‘Dirty Politics’ a whole new goal post to aim at in future, as the PM but in some other capacity. One wonders what other ‘registers’ the PM may use in the coming months as he unloads his policies on a NZ that generally did not vote for him! Perhaps he may slip into one in which he takes away the rights of NZ workers for a tea break---oops, they did that last night, so the ‘tongue will switch’ to yet another focus of his ‘plan for NZ.’ Watch out for the ‘Charter schools, Tongue,’ as he pays back his little friend, ‘David Seymour Charter Schools,’ thereby cementing his alliance with the tiny party that the tongue- twisted convolutions of party politics has given us. Still, at the end of the day once he conveniently forgets one of his tongues, we have this situation because we----or is it you---couldn’t be bothered voting? Did you really think that NZ was in good hands and that the ‘tongue is just—well---a slip of the tongue and it’s just another day in the life of Johnny! www.authorneilcoleman.com