Saturday, August 2, 2014

The 'Eleventh Commandment!

The Ten Commandments are shared by several religions but they all fail to add another one; one that could fundamentally change your life. More about that later. If you have a Jack Russell and it happens to be raining, you cannot not say---'let's stay home girl.' or 'Come on girl, find something to do! It's horrible outside. You've got your toys and you can watch TV.' She gives me that 'are you nuts?' look and then invents new ways to torment me. She jumps up on the couch where I am regally reclining, trying to read the latest edition of MiNDFOOD, where she and I feature in an article (Come-on on, I had to get that in!) and she somehow slips in behind me and starts licking my ears before jumping on me and wiggling her bum as if that is going to stir me into action. Doesn't work, eh girl! 'That's OK,' she says. 'I'll do the toy thing.' Oh no. She then proceeds to take each and every toy from her basket (there's about 16) and spreads them around the room and to top it all off, she dissects one that she has been working on for weeks. Her goal is something akin to bariatric surgery, toy style, whereby she extracts unnecessary organs and makes them into glorious patterns in front of the TV. Then she starts the 'throwing them in the air to see how high she can cast them,' thing. I think she is practising for the 'doggie' Commonwealth Games. Every so often she glances my way to see of there is any change on my disposition. I valiantly try to ignore her. Why do I bother? She has me down to a tee! She knows she will win, so why don't I just give up? I am a mere human and she is a Jack Russell, something designed by man with a bit of help from God, something that is sent to test our resolve, to take us to new heights of patience, to seek new pathways of understanding---oh I better stop. I am just procrastinating....trying to avoid the inevitable. Why don't I accept that some things are impossible. I will put on my 'weather gear' and head on down to the bay--gumboots included and take whatever ---perhaps I shall see the 'monster,' but somehow I suspect that even that beast will be hiding in the shallows or the bushes! (you will need to read a previous blog in order to understand that ridiculous statement!)Today the score---as usual is, Neil nil and Perdy---many victories. OK---let's go then! OH--the Commandment? ALWAYS OBEY YOUR JACK RUSSELL---OTHERWISE THOU SHALT SUFFER! www.authorneilcoleman.com