Australian 'sour grapes' at the success of our white wines.

Australians love to take the piss out of New Zealand. Well it seems that they have gone one step further in that they are saying our New Zealand white wines are just that---piss. What they are failing to admit is that many NZ white wines are outselling the local product. They say that our wines are over rated and that they are nothing more than MacDonald’s wines.

What a hoot. Those narrow minded xenophobic wine makers and merchants are just pissed off (yes same words again) that NZ is a maker of very good wines. My advice---if you can’t hack the heat of the big world of wine making, then get the heck out of the winery.

Come-on mates. Get a sense of balance; not with the wines, cause you already have that. You make great wines; reds and whites. I love to buy your wine but I am not going to go boo hoo, because you outsell us in the world markets. Let the buyers decide, or are you going to do to us what you did re our wonderful apples. I think the heat has got to some of those who make such statements about our beautiful wines. Better still--- come over and sample them in their exotic settings. We shall make you most welcome. Let’s face it----- with the fires and the floods, you all need a break.

Big fish for Melita Dean!-----nice one mate

Do you have a ‘bucket list?’ Have you achieved many of the wishes on it? I have a few, but none of them match up to the ‘achievement ‘of a dear colleague of mine. She has often talked about the ‘big fish;’ I mean really big, not some little plate sized offering. She means Marlin and a big one at that.

Melita has been trying for quite a few years and over that time, I wished her luck, but she always came back empty handed, but not dispirited. Well this past weekend, she hit the Jackpot. Melita hooked a big Marlin, just off the coast from Tairua (not far from Whitianga) on New Zealand’s beautiful Coromandel Peninsula. She had to use a right handed ‘thingumajig’ (see, I know stuff-all about such things) but she’s left-handed. Don’t be surprised if I got that round the wrong way.

For the next hour, Melita fought that fish. It stretched out to 1000 metres and she gradually pulled it in. BY the time she had landed it (without her partner assisting) she and the fish were beat, stuffed and bits in-between------ Then came decision time. Was it to be ‘tag and release’ or take it home? The marlin was so exhausted that she made the decision t to keep it. A butcher from the township will smoke it and we shall all receive the bounty as a result.

Melita’s efforts put her right ‘up there,’ for female big game ‘fisher people’ in NZ. Good one Melita. I shall look at you with entirely different eyes from now on!  Oh, by the way---the Marlin came in at 93 Kilos.

GO MELITA

MELITA AND PROUD HUBBY!

Just wave your card and spend up large--well, not quite.

The very thought of being able to wave my credit card at a terminal and be able to spend up to NZ$80 at any one time is a bit scary; not because I think that I will incur even more debt, but because if my credit card is lot and then picked up by some unsavoury character, I could be out of pocket. Of course my credit card has some sort of insurance on it and as long as I let the company know, I should be fine.

I guess what I am feeling is the old ‘future shock’ syndrome that I well remember teaching kids about in the 1970’s. Maybe I am a belated victim of this terrible affliction; one that will assail me more as I get closer to even more numerous senior moments. The idea that one just needs to wave at a terminal fills me with mistrust.

How can we have confidence in a system that seems so easy to rip off; at least on the surface? If a low-life acquires our cards, they could have some real fun if they acted quickly. I suppose that has happened with the present system too but this development feels like yet another step for the criminally minded entrepreneurs.

One must assume that the banks have done the sums and have an understanding that they will still make huge profits. I am not sure what it is that they know that leads them to this new move, but perhaps the gains for them are more than any expected ‘activity’ that is dishonest. I think I shall make the adjustment and things will go on as normal. One good thing is that I won’t have to line up behind someone even older than me who is trying to remember their pin number; that is after they have managed to find their card in the first place. No doubt the ever improving cameras will be ‘protecting’ us from the worst excesses of these parasites who love to rip us all off.

New Zealand---a 'land of thieves,' especially the 'feathered' kind!

Before someone accuses me of being some kind of ‘anti-New Zealand tourist terrorist,’ read on my friends. Today I heard about an unsuspecting naive tourist from Scotland was mugged by a New Zealander and unfortunately this is not an uncommon occurrence. The victim hails from Scotland and if he is some distant relative, I apologize on behalf of all New Zealanders. Surely tourists should be able to go about their business without been taken advantage of by unscrupulous locals.

This unfortunate gentleman had taken a break to snap some pictures of the magnificent mountains he was travelling through. Perhaps he felt homesick for his native Scotland; the hills and glens a far off memory and paling into significance compared to the beauty he was observing.

He had heard that New Zealand is basically a laid back and generally ‘honest place.’ He had even heard that in the more ‘rural’ areas, one could leave the back door open. He did just that, with his campervan. After all, what could go wrong? The other ‘happy’ tourists looked decidedly decent so what the hell.

Unknown to him a rather feathery ‘native’ was lurking, watching his every move. When Scotty left his van unattended and with the windows wide open the said beast, a New Zealand Highland parrot, called the Kea, took his chances. The sneaky little sod flew into the car and rummaged around, searching for items that could be ‘tradable’ amongst his other criminal friends. Apparently this bird, yes bird, was well connected to a few good fences (if such a person exists).

THE 'VICTIM.'

THE 'CRIMINAL.' 

The naughty Kea spied a little package on the dash board and he pounced. As Scotty watched the Kea flew to ‘mountains high’ to share the proceeds with his mates and the ‘fence.’ In the meantime, Scotty was short of $1300 $NZ. What a very expensive lesson for an unsuspecting visitor. We are deeply ashamed as a nation and no doubt other NZers will step up to the mark and make good for Scotty.

Wake up and savour the smell of freshly made coffee!

Coffee---thank God that is something I should be able to enjoy a few months after my surgery. If I had to choose between coffee and wine, think it would be the wine that goes. I hear that I shall only be able to have one ‘standard’ drink (at most) after a few months and then that’s not guaranteed. I also hear that I ‘will be anyone’s after that drink. I guess it’s going to be a matter of ‘less is more,’ so I shall only have the best.

Coffee, oh coffee. Am I addicted? Maybe---I don’t care. I have a nice Italian coffee machine and I reckon I have become damned good at making a ‘café-quality’ cup and then some. Some may say I am obsessed. Well that’s OK; I can think of much worse obsessions than coffee. What do I love about it?

There’s the smell of freshly roasted beans and then there’s the whole process of making a cup. Yeah I know that you can get a pretty good cup from those Nespresso machines. Yeah, I admit to having some lovely sups at my sisters. I think I am in love with the process though; something akin to the Japanese loving the ‘art of making tea.’

I don’t go quite that far, but anyone visiting (come over if you are buying a book and I shall make you a freebie) can attest to my love of the ‘process.’ If my behaviours cause amusement, then at least I have drawn a smile to what otherwise may have been a boring day for the said visitor.

I search out the best beans and have arrived at the conclusion that ‘fresh is best.’ Beans that are less than a week old since their roasting are most definitely able to produce the best results. Supermarket offerings usually don’t quite match up. I keep going back to a little café on Manukau Road where they have a nice little number called ‘Mrs White.’ What I have found for some of the very expensive brands is that they are better suited to processes other than coffee machines. I think that they are meant for either black coffee or plungers. For that wonderful ‘flat white,’ I like the afore mentioned beans, but that’s not to say that there are no other great beans out there. I will buy from cafes if they make a fine cup and can guarantee ‘fresh beans’ and then it is usually the ‘house brands’ that best suit my machine.

After I have ground my beans in my excellent grinder (don’t use those cheap ‘cutters’—they are crap) and heated my machine, I let the coffee extrude into my little clear cup. I love the way the colour changes from a chocolate colour to deep brown or almost black. Then I ‘do the milk.’ There is an art in this, if you want that silky smooth look. It can depend on the age and style of milk.

Then, I sit down and relax, enjoying every last drop. Not for me, those big cups of ‘flavoured milk’ you sometimes get at cafes in the mistaken belief that you are getting quantity over quality.

If you have decided that I am a big fat snob when it comes to coffee---go for it, while I sip on my delectable offering.

Sometimes your 'little special place' may be closer than you think.

Do you ever dream of that ‘special place;’ you know, visions of water, trees, green grass and beautiful trees? Do you imagine being there with a friend or on your own; maybe with a book and a nice picnic lunch? It’s your place and that is where you go to blow away the concerns of everyday life.

I often discuss this dream with my friends and talk about faraway places and other that are within about two hours drive from home. The other day a good friend suggested we take our dogs somewhere for a swim; this time to a place where we could join them in the water. Our usual place doesn’t quite measure up. Don’t get me wrong: the place where we go nearly every day, Onehunga Bay Reserve, is fantastic for the dogs and it has been instrumental in the formation of recent friendships.

We wracked our brains and then suddenly it hit me. What the heck was I ‘not thinking?’ Less than 300 metres from my home there is a park. It features in my book of short stories, Coastal Yarns.’ The first story, ‘Tuis In The Mist,’ is set in Waikowhai (Faulkner Bay) Bay. There is an upper car park and from there you turn right and an off-leash dog exercise area, with slopping green grass and wonderful trees and lovely view; all leading down to a secluded beach, where at either side of high tide it provides good swimming.

What was I thinking; ignoring this place for seven years?! I made inquiries amongst locals and sure enough; they say it’s great at high tide. I shall now try it out this afternoon with my friend and our dogs. I am really looking forward to seeing what Perdy (alias ‘Spot, in ‘Talk To Me’) and Patch (my mate’s dog) will do when we enter the water with them.

Naturally we are taking a wonderful picnic with us. My friend has baked bacon and egg pie and I have brought some plums, apricots and peaches to complete our little escapade. I shall let you know how things work out. (See the pictures below--- they tell the story)

The path to my 'special place.' Troubleis you have to walk back up!

You're a good girl, Patch---oops--now Perdy is jealous.

It's my stick!

At high tide this beach and the area above it are perfect to be able to make the claim that it is 'my special place,' and it is only about 300 metres from my house.

 

POST SCRIPT--On the way home a guy ran in to my car. His daughter said---'The car's alright.' I said---Fu---the car---how's your DAD?"   He was OK, thank God!

'Coastal Yarns' has been getting hits--- get it direct!

I notice that my book, Coastal Yarns has been scoring hits. If you then go to my website and decide that you don't want to buy it through the PayPal method, then get get it from Trade me (either versions) or through my email---  neilcolemanauthor@gmail.com    The website is www.authorneilcoleman.com If you are in New Zealand the postage is cheap.
My books are:
1) Coastal Yarns
2) Roskill
3) Talk To Me
The website will give you more details.