Sunday, June 12, 2016

Tales from the Coast---Green Acres all over again!

If you are either 'elderly' or just love those really old black and white comedies from 'yesteryear, you will be able to relate to this little gem. Do you remember the rich couple from the city (Zaza Gabor?) was the delightfully over-the-top lady of the house, who with her husband decided to leave busy and somewhat stressful life of the city, to settle in the country. You know the rest, if I have hit the spot.Picture me minus a few of her obvious 'qualities---yeah, I'm not as pretty and certainly not on the rich list or a few more-----below it! BUT, I have been accredited with a few of her other eccentricities. I most certainly posses her ability to bugger things up, even though I try hard!How about this little observation from the Coast. Today, I decided to use the new lawnmower. I have not mowed a lawn for more than 20 years. Now to put you in the picture, I decided that I needed to 'future-proof myself, health-wise---that is, I did not want to stress myself re mowing a big lawn (it'a only about 700m2 and all flat, but with a shite-lode of fruit trees, sharp roses (which are in the most silliest of places, requiring one to manoeuvre any mower around etc---I prefer my dearly departed Dad's solution---I am going to gradually accidentally mow the bastards down! Prickly things!!!! So I went out out and purchased a lawn mower with all the bells and Whites; one that key started and yes---self propelled. My excuse---it was so I did not take a heart turn, given the experiences of late. I have of course since learned that exercise is not going to bring on one of the AF(Atrial Fibrillation) attacks---it seems that I am regularly 'out of rhythm---no news to most of you who know me---lol. Indeed, if anything, exercise is really good for kicking me back into 'normality. Picture me again, taking out my flash new mower, wondering if the bloody thing would set off on its own down the road towards the town centre!It did not---it was a superb experience. I did my best to make it look like I was actually pushing it, looking like a fit and energetic new addition to the 'Coastal' population of Thames. Imagine how hard it was to keep a straight face (extremely hard for me!) when a neighbour across the road, aged in excess of 80, came out with his mower to attend to his lawn. Not for him, a flash self-propelled, key started piece of machinery. NO---he had an old fashioned PUSH MOWER---yip---non petrol! PLUS he had a walking stick. I shall be watching to see when he goes away before I attempt any front yard mowing action in future. I could not stand the SHAME. Oh well---such is life for an ex-city bloke, who decides to adopt the past! Perdy of course, watched from the window, wondering what the hell IO was doing. I swear she was laughing.