Saturday, May 12, 2012

Ah ha--- Australia--- about time you came in more!

It’s so nice to see you coming in from the ---what--- the outback---bush--- I don’t care—I just want you in and reading my blogs. I have tried everything to get you reading--- hell--- for a while I thought that maybe you can’t read, but then I was just taking the piss. I know Kiwis get the absolute piss taken out of them in Australia, but we keep coming back for more.
I tried to call on the ANZAC spirit to generate interest. I was often deep down in the doldrums, thinking that Aussies really don’t love their Kiwi Bros.
I threw a few barbs about some ‘under armed’ notorious incidents in our sporting history—no nothing seemed to work.
I want you to read my books, and of course not forgetting to click on the adverts. That is how I am able to publish my books as a continuing blog online. You don’t have to buy anything, although I have to admit that as my blogs are read by more and more people in lots of countries (except China--- come on China—let your people read me and I shall come a d see you) they seem to be getting more interesting.
I k now that some of you have brought my first book, ‘Coastal Yarns,’ and that it is in some of your libraries. Unfortunately, if you brought them from my old website or my EX-publisher, I got nothing for them, because—well---that’s all water under the bridge.
What did I do? I decided to take a new line and release my books as a blog--- they are:
1)    Talk To Me—a tongue in cheek expose about the talkback radio industry.
2)    Roskill---a book for teenagers and their parents about the evils of Methamphetamine (or ‘P’ as we call it in NZ)
3)    The River Always Flows--- God knows where this book will end. I am releasing it as I write it and I may take alternate scenarios--- not sure yet.
So go back to my old blogs and start at chapter 1 eh mates. DON’T FORGET TO CLICK ON THE ADVERTS AND TO PASS MY BLOG ON--- I am relying on you coussies bros. If the Aussies can’t push this, no one can.
I promise not to stir you up any more--- oops--- of course I will and for Goanna’s sake give it back to me!

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE--- OH hell--- I am going to be hearing that a lot from London soon eh mate.